Livestock, Fair Rides, and Sticking It to the Spanish


The last day we were in Michigan, Laura, McKenna, and I went with John and Diane to the Armada Fair. That’s Armada, Michigan, which is pronounced Ar-May-Da, because, suck it, Spanish! This is ‘Merica, and we’ll pronounce the word you invented any way we want. In fact, I’m thinking of naming my next child Espana, just so I can call him/her Es-Span-Yay.

Feeding goats

McKenna’s goat Hunger Games

While McKenna loved most of the Detroit Zoo, she had been a little disappointed with some animals at the zoo, in part because the lion was sleeping instead of being a badass and tearing up some of those annoying lemurs, and in part because she thought she’d be able to feed all of the animals. At the fair, she not only got to feed the animals, which she loved, she also got to dictate to the animals which one of them would be fed. One greedy goat got a lecture from her for his unwillingness to share with the smaller animals.


Bird you are BAD! You need to share!

After feeding the animals, we had a lunch of fair food, staying away from those newfangled fried foods like fried candy bars and settling for old reliable fried foods like elephant ears. Then we let McKenna go on some rides, and she had a blast.


I love this elephant even though I can’t feed him!

Her mother, however, was at times terrified of the rides.


“We are not going to stop! We are NOT going to stop! OH MY GOD WE CAN’T STOP! Whew, we stopped!”

McKenna got to experience that terror with her first roller coaster.


The stages of fear

I was, therefore, dubious when McKenna later announced that she wanted to go on the roller coaster again. This seemed like one of those occasions where she requested something that she thought she wanted only to, in fact, not want it at all. Sort of like when she asks for a second bowl of cereal only to let her Cheerioes turn into a honey and nut flavored milky paste. Still, we took her back to the coaster.



This was clearly not a Cheerioes-paste situation; McKenna loved the coaster the second time. Almost as much as she loved…


Ice cream…Mmmm… Ice cream…

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